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Questions for Dylan

  • is it comfortable enough to read now or does it still need more panels for easy flow and comprehension

  • pupils - does she really need them? :( I really like no pupils for characters in general because it feels more weird and less like a typical cartoon for little kids style, which I sometimes worry the stuff I make looks like. Some panels I think will be more easily readable later when things have different colours. Like where her eyes are half closed, the eye + eyelid will have different colours. But anyway, if you say pupils would make her expressions a lot better I'll reconsider.

  • Is it a problem that the design isn't fully consistent (variations in things like the shape of her teeth, proportions, size of bricks) or does it read as acceptable creative liberty?

  • panel 11 - does the word 'repent' make sense here? I don't actually know this word, I got it from a translation app so not sure if I used it correctly. Or maybe erase that whole sign idk if I like it. Also what about the rest of the English, is it fine

  • panel 28 - 'eating' instead of 'gnawing'?

  • fyi there will be floors, shadows etc. later once I've filled in the colours

Thank you x 1000 you da bomb

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